Attracting a mate – Give It Up or Wait It Out?

December 20, 2009 by Tia · 20 Comments
Filed under: Conscious Creation, Intention, Law of Attraction

This is a topic that has been talked about in earlier posts (not necessarily related to relationships though) and was brought to my attention again recently.

You see, it’s that time of the year that I’ve been getting quite a few readers asking me about the best way to manifest a relationship (just something about the end of the year that makes us all evaluate our dreams and desires, maybe?).

I’ve heard stories of friends who decided what they wanted, made a list and focused on it till they met the love of their life.

Like my friend who intended to manifest her dream man, met him within 3 weeks, was engaged within 4 months, married within 9 months and is happy as can be.

On the other hand, I hear plenty of stories of people who gave up looking for their soul-mate and just as soon as they took their focus off meeting The One, bam! They literally ran into them around the corner.

I’ve experienced both. I once threw a Universal tantrum, demanded and happily manifested a partner within days. AND I have done it the other way too – intended to be in a relationship, journaled about it and then let it go, meeting someone special just weeks later!

These methods were quite different energetically, and yet, they both worked.

In the first instance, I got mad and stated my desire in no uncertain terms, giving off a ‘this is what I want and I bloody well get it asap’ vibe.

In the other, I was happy and peaceful and just trusted that I would get what I wanted without spending much time thinking about it.

(The common factors in both instances were clarity and determination)

So here’s my question to you:

Do you stay focused on your desire till it manifests, or have you found more success by intending it and letting your focus go elsewhere?

What has your experience been?

Please share your real life (or hearsay) stories and experiences so that others with the same question can benefit from your response.

Gosh, am I ever looking forward to reading about how you met and attracted your partner – as are the readers who emailed me. Thanks in advance for sharing!

ps: Even if you didn’t “manifest” your partner consciously, I’d love to know how you met. It’s the season for love and thanks so share the love with the rest of us here

Tags: love, Relationships

I Choose Winnie the Pooh Happy! What Do You Choose?

August 29, 2009 by Tia · 11 Comments
Filed under: Inspired Action, Life, happiness

pic crtsy crazy-frankenstein.com

I am a bear of very little brain, long words bother me.

So this post is like me. Short and simple and very very sweet.

I woke up this morning with a real conviction – to choose my feelings today.

So I chose Happy!

What Are You Choosing Today?

Add it in the comments section so Tia and I can send you good juju!

Yes, sometimes, it can be THAT easy.

Tags: Being Simple, happiness, love

Where Do You Draw The Line between Ego and Self?

June 19, 2009 by Tia · 21 Comments
Filed under: Inspired Action, Life, Passion, life coaching

Authenticity. Authenticity.

Also known as showing up fully.

This past month I’ve been living from ego rather than service. I let my authentic self be tarnished by feelings of competitiveness, living at 50% of myself, ignoring my values and not being fully present, real or honest with myself and others about my feelings and thoughts.

Nothing “bad” mind you – just restrictions everywhere I looked around. Life in this state is far from pure, joyous and happy. It can still be good but good isn’t enough for me anymore.

Who else feels they are sick of not expressing themselves fully?
Who else wants to shed their scales & emerge as they are?
Who else would like to live courageously & with integrity?

I for one am DONE with living an unauthentic life. With holding myself back for fear that I’ll be alone if no one wants to walk this path with me. With conforming and trying to look good (although those of you who know me may be giggling at the thought of me being a conformist hehe).

Since the last 2 days a lot has been stirring up for me (I learnt from Lynn Koiner and Sophie Lhoste that I’m not alone in this – apparently this summer solstice is a powerful time for changes and divine happenings – woohoo!) and I’m taking gulpy, brave steps to bring myself back from the edge of an ego-driven life, back to service, back to self.

Take the coaching competition I was entered in for instance. It all started as fun and games, asking people to vote for me, getting the word out about my blog, loving the traffic to my website, the supportive comments (esp the one from my mom – that rocked, thanks mum!) ·

Somewhere along the way though, I realised some uncoachlike behaviour was going on and allowed myself to be upset by the tricks other people were using to get to # 1. Everytime I saw people being voted down I would vote them up. And I’d wonder what I was doing in such a contest. Can you guess what happened next? Yep!

I wanted to play them at their own game. Survival of the best-est. And I didn’t like this feeling. That’s not me.

So yeah, it got to the point where I had to stop and question myself …. Why do I need someone to tell me my blog is the best? Would winning this contest make more people like me or make me special in some way? WHO gets to decide I’m the best (or not)? I’ve never liked competitions and in my LOA world, co-operation is a better feel-good place to be in over competition.

To compete fairly and test skills against another is beautiful, like athletes in their finest form. Because it brings the best out in others, rather than the worst. To bring others down while you go up? Not sooooooo much!

It started to not feel good anymore. And you who read this blog know this about me – I always follow my feel-good! If it’s not fun, I’m not doing it. I slacked in following my intuition. Ohh Bugggerr…

It’s scary and empowering to go out on a limb and saying what you need to, without fear of consequences. It’s easy for monkeys but to be a human hanging on the top of a branch, swinging wildly and suddenly letting go….!? Bump, rumble and roll. Ouch. That hurt. Pain sucks. Yet, letting go can teach you to look for where the growth and learning is.

To be authentic, I first had to acknowledge what I’ve not been wanting to, face my frailties and imperfections, embrace them, forgive them, love them and finally, share them with others.

So my friends, In all my ego driven glory, here I stand unveiled. And as I ask myself these questions, I ask you too:

Who do you think you are to live half a life?
One that’s not passionate, fulfilling, authentic and happy?
Where do you get off blaming other people?
What are you not taking responsibility for?
What is the learning from this?
What do you really, really want?
The glory or the peace? True happiness or ego-driven accolades?

Feel free to ask me “who are you to get me to stand up and take charge of my own life”!? I am no-one. And I am everyone. You get to choose if you want to or not.

With this in mind, I decided that what felt good and authentic was to remove myself from this contest. My intuition says this is the right thing to do and this is the month I start trusting it. The little voice in my head saying “but you could win this and be more popular” can just go take a hike. Be sure to take a camel along, it’s a long trip where you’re going!

THANK YOU to all of you who voted me to # 1 – I’ve saved all your comments I am still glad I entered this contest for I know even more now that my worth does not depend on what someone says or thinks about me.

It depends on what I believe to be true. It’s reminded me AGAIN that real happiness and peace come from being true to oneself, and true to others. It showed me how many amazing friends and loyal readers I have. It re-inforced the power of synergy (where my friends and I voted for each other as opposed to taking each other down).

It helped me be kind and loving to myself and accept my imperfections. And my desire for you is to do the same for yourself.

I want you to live your best life ever. I want you to unleash your awesomeness on the world, warts and all.

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You can start by sharing your thoughts and feelings about how you want to show up MORE in your life in the comments section. I am here to listen, encourage and love you AS YOU ARE. You rock my friend

Tags: Authenticity, courage, ego, human nature, love, playing fair, service