/code-blue_20/images/rss.gif)
/code-blue_20/images/coachtia.jpg)
What Do You Want To Be Known For?
Filed under: Conscious Creation, Inspired Action, Law of Attraction, Passion, Spirituality, happiness, love
“What is it that you want to be ‘known’ for?
What idea do you want to represent?
The next 24 hours bring insights, signs and sudden revelation!”
Kim Falconer asked this question yesterday.
I let it sit with me.
At first my mind ran through all the things my social self wants to be known for, things like:
- Making a big difference in this world
- Inspiring thousands of people to live their best lives ever
- Making the most of my life & opportunities
- Being a successful coach
- Helping tons of people get clarity in their lives
- And so on
I let it sit some more.
It was about 10 hours later, that by pure synchronicity, Carol posted this Abe video on Living With Passion on the Good Vibe U forum.
And as I was watching it, it suddenly struck me.
JOY!
Yes, I want to accomplish a lot and make my time here on Earth “worthwhile”.
Yes, I want to inspire people to follow their dreams.
Yes, I want all this and much, much more and still do.
But above all, I want most of all to Further Joy!
To be known for being a JoyGiver, JoySpreader, JoyMonger & ALL things JOY.
It was so ridiculously simple that I had to catch my breath.
Could it be THIS simple? THIS easy!?
As I sat there wondering, I realised my essential self, the part of me that wants to give and share without wanting anything in return was speaking to me loud and clear.
The part of me that knows living my purpose is more about Being than about Doing.
Have you asked yourself questions like:
- What’s my purpose, my mission in life?
- Why am I here?
- What am I meant to do with my life?
- How can I best use my talents to help people?
- How can I be happy?
- What fulfills me?
Yeah, me too. In a quest to answer these questions I read a lot.
From Wayne Dyer to Steve Pavlina to Don Miguel Ruiz to Lynn Grabhorn to Eckart Tolle to Abraham-Hicks, you name it, I’ve read their books.
I also discovered coaching, got myself a coach, attended coach training, became a coach, kept attending workshops (and still do), listened to hundreds of audios and watched countless videos.
With each passing month, I had a better idea of what I wanted to accomplish with my time here.
And yet, it felt like I was trying too hard.
I’d decide what I want and then change my mind as though the “thing” I’d settled on – like inspiring thousands of people to live their best lives ever – somehow seemed hollow and vacuous.
What the heck does that mean anyways? Inspire people to live into their potential?
And who was *I* to take on this mission? Something about it just didn’t sit right. Could my life purpose really be about other people instead of about me?
Got me thinking about Mother Teresa – what was hers? Was it to provide support and help the poor? Or was it to love? Seems to me that everything she did came from Love. She was BEING love, not just giving love.
Too often we make ours about “doing something for others”.
When you realise it’s about being who you were meant to be, the doing comes naturally.
It’s not important to know what to do before you know what or who to be.
So last night when it came to me with intense clarity that I needed to let the answer come to me rather than go chasing to it, it sure surprised me when it did.
Cos joy is something I take for granted, not something I thought could actually be my purpose.
I’d thought my purpose was something bigger…. grander….. on a larger scale that would make me feel like I’d REALLY made a difference.
A little thing like Joy? Really?
Yes, really.
I haven’t stopped smiling since this revelation. I’m not sure how exactly I’ll do this but I have an idea – to start with, I’m bringing joy into what I do, how I engage with people, my thoughts, my actions. I already practice this, and with this new awareness, it seems a lot more delicious.
Fancy my purpose being something I can live each day, every day!
Fancy it being something I’m already being and doing 
(No co-incidences there, hey!)
Now, I’ve got a little exercise for you.
First, write down what comes to mind when I ask “what do you want to be known for”?
- Leave a comment & let me know.
Second, take this question with you into your day.
- Let it sit with you as you go about your routine.
- Every now and then ask yourself the question again and write down what comes to mind.
- Don’t try to force it, or write what you think you should write.
- Let it flow.
- At the end of the day, revisit your list and see what pops out at you.
I have a feeling whatever you think it is right now, it’s probably simpler and more basic than that It’s something you are ALREADY being and doing, and just haven’t fully realised yet. Or maybe you have? Can’t wait to hear it!
What is your soul calling you to be or do?
_____________________________________________________________
I’d love to hear if the answer changed or remained the same after a while. Enjoy the process and thanks for sharing your thoughts, as always, you inspire me!
Pursuing Happiness Is A Trap & YOU’RE in it.
Filed under: Intention, Life, Passion, Spirituality, happiness
Ever feel like you did something really stupid?
Irrational.
Something that made no sense at all.
Ever then kicked yourself when you did it again?
And again. And again?
You’re so aware, you really should’ve known better..
Ever made an assumption that turned out to be totally wrong?
What about the “good” assumptions – like assuming birthdays should be extra special days just cos you were born on that day. Like the best time to set new intentions is when it’s a new moon.
Like someone you love should love the same things you do.
How do these serve you?
When you assume something, it’s most likely based in fear. Fear that keeps you from truly being happy as long as you associate those thoughts with past actions and experiences.
I was thinking about assumptions and anticipation today as I wandered into my favourite little crystal / mystic shop near Queenstown.
About how I anticipated this trip and how I assumed it would make me feel. Getting here to find that it’s neither how I dreamed, nor how I expected.
(You’ve been with me as I planned this trip, excitedly booked flights, got my visa, and packed excitedly)
So where did that state of sheer happiness go?
Don’t get me wrong – it’s all going well and I AM happy, it’s just that I might have mistaken high energy and anticipation for happiness.
Thinking that cos it wasn’t as warm (weather wise) or as much of a homecoming I thought it would be, I would have to do something to be ‘happier’.
You see, in my mind, it was ’supposed’ to be a certain way.
As I browsed the shop still musing, I was drawn to a book.
Hello, the Happiness Trap. Resonance! What I read struck me: Did you know you’re shooting yourself in the foot when you make ‘looking for happiness’ your main goal in life?
Living a values based life is what will bring you true happiness, as opposed to living a goals based life – quoted non verbatim.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about dreams and goals and the pursuit of happiness is definitely one of human-kind’s biggies.
It’s when we assume that anything less than a happy vibe will take us away from this ultimate goal, that we pay a huge price – fear, anxiety and stress.
To live an illusion of happiness, most people shy away from negative feelings and do whatever they can to make them ‘go away’. These people are sometimes you and me.
(Even though for the most part, we DO know better, yay us!)
You’re smart enough to allow emotions and feelings to be fully experienced, knowing that what you resist persists.
You know all you want is to feel good again and being LOA and personal development savvy, you’ll stay with it so you can get past it. The way out of it is often through it.
It happened to me when I talked about being dragged into the emotions and drama of being a victim in the past, when I was hard on myself for being in that place again, till I realised just how far I had actually come.
But this book really got me seeing things differently again.
It made me see that anxiety is normal. Contrary to belief, happiness is not yet our normal state of being and is influenced by the fears of others around us as we’re growing up.
(I believe we ARE headed that way one little step at a time, just not fully there yet).
Happiness is not the same as feeling good.
It’s a feeling of being alive, full of life force energy. And by its very nature, life force energy covers all human emotions and ranges.
Just like the tide ebbs and flows, nature reinvents itself, trees and plants grow and die, life begins and ends, there is always a polar opposite of every emotion and feeling known to us.
This brings a whole new meaning to the term ‘acceptance’.
Accept not just the feeling that is in the moment, but also the fact that life WILL be up and down, you WILL sink back into old unwanted patterns every now and then, things will not always work out like you want, you WILL be sad, mad, bad, glad many more times in your life.
Accept that no matter how much spiritual work you do, how aware you are, how much you’ve learned and grown, you will experience the full range of ‘good’ and ‘bad’, as long as you live.
I’ve ‘ ed’ good and bad because it’s time to stop labelling these emotions. When you label, you separate and create pain by questioning why.
Accept that this is really, truly, ok. Like Charlie of Productive Flourishing says, what would happen if you didn’t think it was ‘bad’ to feel down?
Let go of that damn happiness “goal”.
The happiness that comes from achieving a goal or a dream is short-lived. If you’re like me, 20 seconds later you’re wondering what’s next. Goals will come and go and keep getting achieved.
Enjoy the anticipation instead!
The thing with anticipation (aka the journey) is that it’s almost always more fun than the actual event (aka the goal) you’ve been waiting for to happen.
It’s been said before and I’ll say it again – really, really, enjoy the ride. Cos when it’s over, that’s what you’ll remember.
Don’t make the memory about getting off the roller coaster and being sick, make it be about the stars you saw on top of the ride, the people who looked like ants below, and the gobs of fun you had squealing and laughing.
The moments each day is made up of, the tears and smiles, the ups and downs.
And one more thing – Forgive yourself. Love yourself. That is all.
__________________________________________________________________
So .. watchu thinking? What’s your take on Happiness as a Goal vs a Value? What do you believe is your natural state of being? Do you agree or disagree with this post? I’m inviting your comments and would love to know what you’ve got to say! Cheers!
Not Having Fun? You’re Doing It ALL Wrong!!
Filed under: Conscious Creation, Fun, Inspired Action, Intention, Life, happiness
I’m the Queen of Taking Inspired Action and Following My Fun n Feel Good!
But sometimes even Queens can forget to put their crowns on.
Ever gotten all gung ho about a new idea? Gotten really excited about it, thought about it day and night and joined a 4 month program that would help bring it to life?
Which is all well and good you know.
Ever been so consumed by it that it wasn’t fun anymore? Stayed up past 3am thinking, woken up late, felt overwhelmed and tired all day long? I have.
Whooaa!
Even though it’s only been a few days, it’s so not how I run my life!
Somewhere between the grand idea and today, I let my Fun Factor slide. For some reason, thinking about this new business seemed more like work than play (unlike my coaching practice – setting this up was pure fun!).
Ever taken action from a totally-uninspired-low-vibe-space even when you know better? Yep, me too.
As I explored why, it struck me that sometimes, we tend to get too serious about things that are really important to us (I call it getting “significant”). It’s as though by taking it “seriously”, we’ll appear to be more responsible or capable.
We’ve yet to embrace the concept that taking something on doesn’t mean we have to give up having fun with it! Or that we can be “serious” about fun and committed to what we want without getting all tied up in knots.
Lifetime of “work = work, play = play” messages anyone? Well, it just doesn’t work like that anymore!
If one of your values is Fun/Play (like mine), then you know that the more you lose sight of it, the harder it gets to accomplish your goals. And the more action you take, the less you end up doing. Funny how that can happen.
So it was with that Thunk! Clunk! in my brain – The downstream way is to feel good first! Do what ups your vibe, gives you energy and makes you feel good. THEN look at your to-do list and what else needs to be done.
Don’t even TOUCH or do anything till you’ve spent a few minutes connecting with what makes you happy and energetic, k? All you need is 5 minutes or less so don’t tell me you don’t have the time. Make it a priority.
(Btw, love how this is turning into a series of “what I learned from the last few days” posts!)
I’m a smart cookie. Soon’s I remembered that, I changed it around. I don’t get out of bed without a quick 5 minutes of meditation (getting out of bed and meditating felt like work, so I stay in now).
The first thing I do when I turn on the computer now? Nope, not email.
Music!
The second? Dancing to the Music.
Right here in my living room cum office cum cubbyhole apartment.
Then I call a friend or someone I’d like to connect with for a little check in/chat. Doing this yesterday was so awesome that my fun factor went through the roof! I chatted with one friend and brainstormed crazy business ideas and names with another.
Got SO energised that the rest of the day was 100 times more productive and fun than the last 2 weeks have been.
And I got to play with these concepts again:
- If I’m not having fun, I’m doing it all wrong.
- Fun starts with feeling good about what I’m doing at any given time.
- Raise your energy first before you tackle the rest of it.
- Plugging away is NOT inspiring!
Ps: As I was writing this post, I took about 2 breaks to dance to Chris Brown’s Forever and Rihanna’s Please Don’t Stop The Music. So much fun!
Let’s recap shall we?
Tia’s Top Tips for Productivity:
- Start day with quick 5 minute meditation / intention setting
- Check in with yourself every couple of hours – how are you feeling?
- If your work’s starting to drag, give yourself a 5 minute FUN break.
- Play music and dance to bring out creativity
- Or phone a friend / someone who inspires you
- Indulge in your chosen “breaktivity” and let it UP your energy level
- Then take some fantastic inspired action
- Oh and one last time – make it FUN, dude!
‘Cos when you’re floating downstream you’ll find that the EAC you were looking for, fighting your way through to find, was the very same one you were already floating in.
In case I lost you there, here’s a wee recap from Finding Nemo (watch 1st 2 minutes):
Marlin: OK, Crush. I need to get to the East Australian Current. EAC?
Crush: [laughing] Oh, dude. You’re ridin’ it, dude! Check it out!
______________________________________________________________________
Where do you make “life” more serious than it needs to be? Paying bills / mortgage/ trying to make a difference in the world – how can you remind yourself to make it FUN and bring play into it? Looking forward to hearing your ideas!
These Are a Few of My Favourite Things ♬ ♬
- Picture sourced from iranian.com
To count my blessings, focus on what I want to create & list what makes me happy, I decided to get em together in one sweet place. Why alphabetically? Oh, just cos I can 
I’ll be back to add more as I think of them (bonus: will keep me focused on what I like for the next few days, yay!)
Go ahead and share yours too (alpabetically or however you want) so I can steal some of them. Hehe.. Let the favourites games begin.
- A’s about Awareness, adaptability, authenticity, almond butter, adventures
- B brings me BFFs, babies – their laughs and cuddle factor, bubble baths, blip.fm, blogging, board games
- C creates Community, creativity, coaching, cafe catch ups with friends, chocolate, colours, campfires. Also, courage, contentment and conscious creation.
- D .d.d.d Dancing! Dates with my man, DVD nights with my gfs
- ENERGY!! EQ, Epiphanies (they ROCK!)
- F starts with Fun, festivals, fall (crisp fall air!), family, facing my fears (ok, I don’t love this but I love how I feel after!), feelings, financial freedom, FREEDOM of choice
- Gelato (nutella gelatos!), glitter
- Hula hooping, happiness, huggling (a mix of hugging and cuddling), humour
- I = Inspiration, Intentions, inner peace, instant connections – the kind where you meet someone and feel like you`ve been friends forever
- Jewel (the word – I love the word Jewel!)
- Kick ass people – too many to name, karmafication
- Law of attraction, leverage, love, living, life, laughing till I snort or my sides ache (whatever comes first), Leonard Cohen
- Making up words, music, movies
- Nutella (you KNEW this was gonna be first, didn’t you!), New Zealand
- Oreosssss
- Photographs – taking and looking at, personal growth, play-fullness
- Q: Quad biking
- Responding, not reacting. Reading inspirational stuff, randomness (being random), road trips
- Scrubs (yes, the TV show), sparkly stuff, snow globes, singing out loud in the shower and around my house (also in cars), social media!
- Travel, twitter, taking risks, trampolines (jump, jump, jump!), Tribe (as in, “my people”)
- U. Yes, U . Unconventionality, uniqueness
- Visioning … also known as daydreaming, videos (esp high energy ones like these)
- Writing (that wasn’t obvious was it , white water rafting, world citizenship
- Xcalibur (don’t tell me to spell it with an E, shhh X was feeling lonely)
- Y? I already said – just cos! Yin n Yang, Yodanese
- Zen habits and Zillion (as in, can’t believe the zillion things I came up with)
___________________________________________________________________
This wasn’t easy. It WAS real fun though Who’s next?
It’s Now Or Never, Don’t Waste Another Minute!
Filed under: Conscious Creation, Fun, Law of Attraction, Life, Passion, courage, happiness
♫♫ It’s now or never,
come hold me tight
Kiss me my darling,
be mine tonight ♫♫
♫♫ Tomorrow will be too late,
it’s now or never
My love won’t wait ♫♫
Are you one of those people who believe that beauty, abundance, opportunities and luck are all around us and would so know them if you were eyeball to eyeball with them?
Or have you been trained to expect it at certain times, hence losing out on opportunities to see them, even when in your face?
I reckon I’m a bit of both. Or at the very least, I used to be the 2nd, not noticing or appreciating the incredible amount of love, abundance and blessings in my life. And there were plenty!
But that was before I learned to look for and focus on what was right (huge shift from looking for what was wrong!). And before I learned about the Law of Attraction, conscious creation and how we create our own reality.
Before coach training taught me that curiosity and openness were assets, not liabilities (I know, right?! I can’t imagine telling someone to be closed up and uninterested in others, yet I’ve been told to do that to “protect” myself from hurt and disappointment. Ha! ha! Sweet, well meaning people .
In the past, I was always looking for the big, obvious scenarios. Defining success by those standards. You know, the ones I talked about here.
And now, I know better.
I know what we can’t really schedule fun, recreation and play for a limited period of time. Linear demarcations between a time to work hard and a time to play? Yes, that’s what they all say but me, I say balderdash! Let’s not compartmentalise our lives anymore, k’.
Who says you can’t have your cake and eat it too? That’s what cakes are FOR dontcha think? I swear, if I ever come across the person who made THAT one up… ooooh!
You and I, we’re part of the growing breed of people living consciously, realising that we’d rather not wait till we’re retired at 60 to start having fun. Breaking out of that old way of thinking, and creatively bringing in ways to enjoy our NOWS. The whole dance like no one’s watching, love like…
(ps: have I ever mentioned how glad I am that you’re with me in this? Consider it said and thank you!)
Reminds me of the Joshua Bell experiment. People pay bunches of $$ to watch him in concert and rave about him because they expect to be blown away by his talent.
Yet when he played at a subway station for 45 minutes, no one appreciated it or recognised him (except for a smart 3 year old who kept wanting to run to him. Sensing a theme here from my last post… 3 year olds are the epitome of BEING! Time to let your inner 3 year old call the shots maybe?)
Apparently he was “in the wrong place at the wrong time” (from one of bystanders) cos the subway station is about people running through like drones with one and one intent only – to make it to their destination without any distractions on the way.
People, people! HOW many times have you heard “it’s about the journey, not the destination”?!
Well of course you’re journeying to GET there but when you enjoy the steps it takes you to reach that happy place, you get there faster.
Because you don’t focus on the time it took to get there but the time of your life you had GETTING there – and time sure flies when you have fun!
I couldn’t finish without sharing the option I LOVE (and shared on my facebook fan page which, btw, you can join here!) The message?
Make it FUN!!
Every minute of every day is an opportunity to enjoy life. Create as many of those moments as you can daily, rather than waiting for the weekend or your annual holiday to let loose.
___________________________________________________________________
What’s something you can do to bring more of this essence into your life? How did you change the way you look at life and what does that life look like now? What advice would you give someone who is scared they may seem irresponsible if they started having more fun? I know you’ve got the words, so share them people. Much love xo
Tuesday Tip – Face One Fear Today!
Filed under: Conscious Creation, Life, Passion, Tuesday Tips, courage, happiness
When you first learned to walk, everyone loved and encouraged you! Smart baby, they said, you’ll be walking before you know it.
So you learned to celebrate “failure” as a stepping stone to success. It was the natural order of life.
As your grew up, you changed. You became a quivering mass of jelly. A creature of habit and comfort. Ok maybe I’m being a bit harsh but you know as well as I do, just how much you sell yourself short. Admit it!
So WHY are you so scared of failing? If you don’t know how to do something, you won’t even try cos you’re scared you’ll fail and others will laugh or say I told you so.
You’ll be rejected and heaven help you if that happens, cos it’s obviously the end of the road for you 
.
Well guess what – those who laugh or put you down are to be pitied, cos they are SO scared they won’t even try whereas you, YOU will take that chance and learn and grow from it, no matter what happens!
Now, Isn’t that something to rejoice about?
As I have been thinking about this post it has brought to my mind a very common misperception that I am ready to let go of ~ that we EITHER fail OR succeed.
You’re with me right? We really fail AND succeed at the same time. There is no failure when we make it a part of success!
“I’ve missed over 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games; 26 times I’ve been trusted to take the game-winning shot…and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” — Michael Jordan, Basketball Player
I love that quote, it really helps put things in perspective. He (or someone else) also said you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
That’s one of the reasons I took on this 100 things I fear in 1oo days project, where I do one thing daily that scares me.
- From reaching out to connect with someone, to
- Asking for help,
- Hugging strangers in the middle of downtown Vancouver,
- Laying in the middle of a pavement for a few minutes in broad daylight,
- Following my instincts inspite of fear … and much more..
.. all in aid of stretching past my comfort zone and growing my strength and courage in the process. Learning that the only thing that matters is how I feel about myself. Learning not to let my insecurities and fears be in charge of me.
No matter what your beliefs, you only get ONE shot at THIS life you’re living today. As each day, month and year passes, do you realise just how precious this gift of life is? I find myself wanting to make the most of it, everyday.
Don’t want to wait till something awful happens for me to start cherishing this precious, precious gift. I want to be reminded of it all the time.
Don’t you agree, that to spend most of our lives in fear, never doing, saying or being what we want, is a gross waste of our time, talent and purpose on Earth?
Today, I’m asking YOU to do one thing that scares you, that you wouldn’t dream of doing for fear of rejection, loss, feeling silly or any other excuse you have. That’s all they are, excuses.
And to encourage you, I’m posting an 8 second video of me looking really self conscious, silly and giggly as I chant “free hugs, free hugs” to people passing by! It took me about 20 minutes to feel comfortable with it and within an hour I gave out over 50 hugs. It was an AMAZING experience!
One lady even stopped her car at the red traffic signal, ran out across the road, hugged my friend and ran back into her car. Unbelievable!
My favourite? The little 3 yr old who ran to me with arms outstretched and gave me at least 3 hugs.
Look at her gorgeous little face.. Aww!
Of course, there were those who scowled and tried to avoid us But you know what? That was all good too as it really reinforced the notion that “rejection isn’t personal” .
What a wonderfully empowering feeling THAT is.
To those who took a chance on a hug from a stranger, thank you for being so open to love and the human spirit!
If I can face my fear of being on camera, looking foolish, and posting a lopsided video that I couldn’t figure out how to straighten, imagine what ELSE I could do!?
______________________________________________________________________
And YOU my friend, what are you not doing because you’re worried, scared, fearful or lack confidence? Share it with us, and then commit to doing it. We’re rooting for you all the way!!
I’m especially talking to those of you who read but feel like you have nothing to say – I’m telling you that you DO. So even if your act of courage is to write a comment that you always shy away from, do it now! Looking forward to hearing from you Thanks for being brave. You’re AWESOME.
I Choose Winnie the Pooh Happy! What Do You Choose?
pic crtsy crazy-frankenstein.com
I am a bear of very little brain, long words bother me.
So this post is like me. Short and simple and very very sweet.
I woke up this morning with a real conviction – to choose my feelings today.
So I chose Happy!
What Are You Choosing Today?
Add it in the comments section so Tia and I can send you good juju!
Yes, sometimes, it can be THAT easy.
Sign up for the Inspired Action! ezine and bonus Top Tips for Happiness report
Get Updates on Blog Posts
OR VIA EMAIL:Follow Blog on Facebook
- The Epiphany - Or Why I Don`t Have What I Want (27)
- 7 Fun Ways to Manage your Vibe! (26)
- When WILL You Learn!? (26)
- What An Onion Has To Do With Listening To Your Body.. (25)
- Pursuing Happiness Is A Trap & YOU'RE in it. (25)
- Guest Post: How Pennies Changed My Life (24)
- Revolutionary Idea That Will Blow Your Mind! (24)
- Summer Solstice Intentions - Bring on Clarity and Intent, Baby! (23)
- How To Manifest Almost Anything You Want (22)
- "Doing What Feels Good"- A Cop Out? (22)
- Lacking Ambition & Drive - How To Light That Fire? (22)
Download Free Personal & Professional Life Assessment Forms
