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What An Onion Has To Do With Listening To Your Body..
Filed under: Conscious Creation, Inspired Action, Life, Passion, Spirituality
I was afraid she’d know what I had done.
As my mom entered my room, I wondered if she noticed the overpowering smell.
She touched my head and felt the heat burn into her hand.
The onion safely tucked away in my armpit had done its work. I now had a fever and it was enough to get me out of going to school on a day I really didn’t want to go.
(I’ll wait till you’ve stopped laughing at my ingenuity).
Fast forward to present time. The method has changed but the process remains the same.
When there’s something I don’t want to do, or when a major change needs to happen in my life (whether it be thoughts, behaviours, actions), and I ignore it, I get sick or hurt.
When I’m letting life happen to me instead of making life happen, I feel tired, listless, low on energy and totally unmotivated.
Like me, I know many of you have learned the hard way that avoiding a situation that’s not working anymore will just lead to it biting you on the bum.
If you won’t make the change, the Universe will oblige with a kick on the rear.
Have you seen that TV show – I didn’t know I was pregnant? I watched it the other day and was dumbstruck by how out of touch these women were with their bodies. They’re not alone though, it’s a common malaise in our world.
The more unconscious we are about our needs, the more we distract ourselves with wants, desires, possessions and things that don’t have anything to do with nurturing our bodies or souls, the further we are removed from our inner selves.
If you’ve ever woken up in the morning with an anxious feeling in your stomach as you prepare for a job interview, if you’ve ever sweated at the thought of asking a girl out, if you’ve ever taken an exam thinking you were going to fail, or wondered how you were going to make your mortgage payments, well, that’s not what I’m talking about.
All this is pretty darn normal and you’d have to be made of steel not to be nervous about these ‘milestones’ or important things in life.
I’m pointing to the things you do over and over on a regular basis, which twist your stomach in a knot and has you hating parts of your life or at the least, fill you with unease. Yet, you do them. If that isn’t madness, what is?
Like not wanting to get up and go to that sucky job for one more day and yet, not having the guts to do something else.
Like hating where you live, but not moving just cos you’d have to start over.
I’ve seen it time and again.
- Friends who get sick after months of hating their jobs and being too scared to do anything about it
- The girl at the store who looks like she’s sleep walking and would do well as a zombie
- The kid who’s playing soccer when he really wants to act, cos his folks have high expectations of him
- The wife who puts her dreams on hold to serve her family and is secretly miserable
- The husband who crushes his musical career to provide for his kids
I’ll just bet it’s happened to you too.
The thing is, if you’re lacking energy and motivation, chances are it doesn’t have as much to do with what you’re eating or doing, as much as what you’re thinking or making yourself do.
Your body is merely an expression of your thoughts and feelings. It’s your own personal barometer telling you how aligned you are with your life’s purpose.
It comes down to this: Are you doing what makes you happy? Are you following your passion?
Wayne Dyer talks about his son Sands, in Excuses Be Gone. Sands hates waking up in the morning, is always late to classes, has low energy and is often tired if he wakes up before noon.
And yet, when he goes on surfing trips or visits his dad in Maui, he’s up at the crack of dawn, making sandwiches and hitting the surf all day long. This, inspite of having stayed up late talking to other surfers, studying waves etc.
What a difference passion makes!
Luckily for Sands, his dad knows all about following your bliss and encourages him to follow his dreams.
And how about that Louise Hay?
You’ve probably heard about or read her book “You Can Heal Your Life”. She talks about how illnesses and diseases are psycho-somatic, meaning they arise from dis-ease in your thoughts and feelings.
In her book, she explains how our beliefs and ideas about ourselves are often the cause of our emotional problems and physical maladies and how, by using certain tools, we can change our thinking and our lives for the better.
I’ve seen it in action so many times in my life.
- When I didn’t want to be a massage therapist anymore but instead of quitting, I waited until I injured my wrist and couldn’t work for a year to give it up
- When I was living in the US and was tired of my life there but was too scared to leave and I sprained my ankle rendering me useless till I left
- When I injured myself about 5-6 days in a row before I finally changed something that wasn’t working for me
(In hindsight, I was subconsciously wearing those slippers so I’d have an excuse to create change and my fear wouldn’t be able to stop me!)
Time for a change?
2 weeks ago, when I realised it was time to move on from a couple of projects that I committed to and didn’t, I got sick for 5 days.
That’s when I finally decided I’d had enough. It was time to be more conscious and aware.
So, I listen to my body and am so in tune with it that I can tell right away if I’m aligned with my life, thoughts,words and passion. And I take action right away if I’m not!
So what about you?
Do you take action as SOON as you realise something’s not kosher, or do you ignore it till you’re forced to take action? Do you wait to get sick / unhappy / pushed in a corner before you’ll take a break?
Or do you pick up the message, watch for signs and pay attention to the message your body and circumstances are giving you?
When you start making small changes as soon as you know it’s needed, it’s much easier on you than when you wait till something awful happens. I’ve been lucky and gotten away with minor-ish injuries. And I’m not waiting for a serious shock to happen before I start listening!
Be willing to get in touch with your body today. Let it express your inner desires. A good place to start is with questions like what is your body telling you? What are you ignoring? What does it want you to do?
Starting today, make that a priority.
Get in touch with your body by meditating on it, thanking it for how hard it works for you, spending 5 minutes in complete silences, weekly walks, time alone, monthly massages, etc. It doesn’t matter how much time you spend, it matters how often you do it.
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You with me on this? I’d love to hear what you think. Please share your experiences! What has your body been telling you and what happens when you listen / don’t listen? Thanks!
Emergency Manifesting Technique – for When It’s THIS Close & You’re Losing Patience!
Filed under: Conscious Creation, Inspired Action, Intention, Law of Attraction
Words have a lot of power. You know that.
Feelings, even more so.
Combine the two with a healthy mix of goodness and you’ve got a recipe for turning your dreams into reality.
You decide what you want, then you act as if, intend, visualise, journal, write scripts for your new reality, align with it etc.
It’s close, so close and you’re feeling really great about it. You just KNOW it’s happening right now and you’re enjoying the ride, practicing infinite patience.
Then, you wake up one morning and ask “Where is it? Why hasn’t it happened yet? Hmm.. that house better sell soon…. why isn’t my soulmate here yet…. what if I lose this job… why aren’t my perfect clients here yet…”
One little thought.
That’s all it was. You quickly try to recover and go back to believing, but a little seed has been planted.
Shortly after, it happens again. Now you’re starting to get upset and before you know it, you’re sinking fast into “it’s never gonna happen, might as well give up but please, please Universe let it happen, I know it will happen, but please can you make it happen now, I’m tired of waiting”!
You’ve skidded out of alignment with your desire by letting fear creep in.
That’s how it goes. If you haven’t gotten too out of alignment, you quickly steer back into feeling and acting as if what you want has already happened. You’re back on track!
Sometimes all it takes is a little tweak to let go of any resistance that may be blocking your manifestations.
When you sense an attachment or sabotage coming up, you can change it around by feeling through the fear, changing your words, doing something that makes you feel good and upping your vibe.
And at other times, it’s getting into that vibe that trips you up. That’s when you start wondering how to re-create it, how to get back into it, what techniques to use etc.
Recently, I’ve been manifesting a trip to New Zealand.
I did all the ‘right’ things – set my intention, acted as if (sorting clothes to take along, cancelling cable, writing rent check in advance etc), declined party invites, bought my ticket, applied for a visitor visa.
All was good till I realised I was cutting it fine.
A little panic set in wondering if I’d get my passport back in time. As that thought set in, delays started happening. My thoughts spiraled down until I was gripped with fear that I’d have to cancel my trip.
With less than 10 days to go till my flight left, I knew I had to do something, and fast if I wanted to be on it!
So I put my emergency plan into action (which I came up with right after I decided I needed one!).
- First, I sat down and asked “what do I really want”, no really, really want. I want the trip to happen, yes, but more than that, I want peace. Whether I go or not.
So I think peaceful thoughts, tweet and write down “I invite peace”, feel it in my body, listen to meditation music for an hour, and ask the Universe for help.
Within minutes, I am directed to a blog post about peace, someone tags me in a gratitude video about peace, and I find a Byron Katie video on ending suffering and becoming peaceful. Nicely played, Universe!
I do The Work to stop out of control thoughts. Ooooooh, this feels good!
- With spirits lifted, I look around for the next Inspired Action step.
Which leads to me writing an email to myself saying “Dear Tia, Your visa has been approved and will be with you by Friday” (this step is all about doing whatever you feel drawn to do).
- This makes me smile. Score! Feeling better already. What shall I do next?
A walk, you say? Ok. Straight to the bookstore to buy a few books and on the way home, I send love to the world around me, practically skipping for joy in the rain.
- I send love and gratitude to the visa officers.
Pure, unconditional thanks and appreciation for all the work they are doing, for their well being. Different from “thank you for giving me my visa”. I ask for nothing. This makes me feel so blissful, I could float in the sky like Balloon Boy!
I get home, turn on my computer and find an email saying “Hello Tia, I am pleased to let you know that your visa has been approved and we have mailed it to you today. You should receive it in the mail by Friday”.
I smile. I’m not jumping out of my chair as I thought I would cos I am already where I want to be – in the land of peace and joy. The turnaround in my feelings and this event has happened in the space of 2 hours!
With a thanks to the Universe and blurry eyes, I sense the power of my new EMT in ceasing suffering, turning any situation around and changing my vibe.
Many of us are VERY good at feeling now as we would feel then and are excellent manifestors. Still, there are times when doubt or fear creep in and nothing seems to work.
The next time you get caught up in the story and can’t get to your “feel good”, pre-pave your way into that feeling by focusing on what you need right in this moment.
Which = Peace or something like that. Watch how your feel good just FLOWS naturally from there
Btw, this technique also works when you don’t know how you would feel then ie, can’t imagine how it would feel like to sell your house, get married, achieve your particular dream, or when it seems too distant.
Ask for what will make you happiest in the moment.
It was peace for me, it could be something different for you. I’m betting peace will resonate with many of you though. Cos even if you can’t imagine what it would feel like to get what you want, you DO know what peace feels like. Right?
It feels like a calm, happy acceptance that all is well in this moment.
What I learned from this:
1) Act and feel now as you would feel then
2) Let go of the outcome
3) When you can’t let go cos it’s so important to you or coming down to crunch time, go for peace!
4) If you’ve gotten out of alignment with your desire or let doubt creep in, it’s a hard sell to get back on that horse. So make your way back there one step at a time.
Oh and posts for the next 1.5 months will be coming to you from the warm Southern Hemisphere. Woohoo!
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I would love to hear if you’ve had a similar experience AND to know what your emergency manifesting technique is. How do you stay aligned in the face of “deadlines” or time pressures? Thanks in advance for sharing!
Unmanifesting The Manifested – How To KEEP What You Attract?
Filed under: Inspired Action, Intention, Law of Attraction, Life
This was my status message on FB yesterday:
So. What does it mean when one attracts situations/things/people easily & then unmanifests them within weeks, just as easily? Was the 1st manifestation an illusion or is it fickle mindedness?
It has happened with me enough times to get really curious about the process of asking, receiving and unmanifesting our manifestations.
Is it that we think we want something and then change our minds when we get it – kinda like how girls tend to fall for emotionally unavailable men and how men lose interest after the chase? Yes, it’s a big generalisation and also partly true.
Have you ever found yourself asking for something, intending it, seeing it come true and soon after, lost interest in it? What do you make of that? Was it that:
- your initial intention wasn’t clear enough
- you sent out mixed messages
- fear came in the way
- it was an opportunity to test the waters with small manifestations
- you needed validation that you were on the right track
- you resist the changes your dream coming true brings
- you resist the BIG stuff you want, hence manifest smaller stuff
- you manifest dreams that are great to have but not THAT important to you and not what you REALLY want
- you manifest things in order to know whether you really want that cos until then you may just think you do and this shows you how you really feel about it?
There could be so many underlying reasons you attract what you want (or think you want) and then not want it anymore. Lets see if we can simplify this a little further. So you:
- wanted something, got it and then decided it was too much / got bored / didn’t want it anymore and that change in energy and vibe made it go away
- got it, were afraid of losing it and so, sabotaged it
- didn’t want it
- are addicted to the struggle and drama of getting and losing
- something else I’m missing here
When I put these thoughts out there, I got some great responses which I want to share with you:
If the “sending” intention is strong, you will attract what you want. However, as time passes, several reasons can interfere and weaken the original impulse especially if things develop in an unwanted way, development is out of alignment with the sending intention or your conditioned negative, self-limiting, fearful perception, thoughts, communication, and behaviour overrides and dilutes the power of the intention. Then, poof! Yet another disappointment. – MW
If David Hawkins (Transcending Levels of Consciousness) knows his stuff, then each higher level of awareness brings with it a greater ease of manifestation. And then the very human “Goldilocks” behaviour can kick in. “I thought this was it, but now I know it’s not.” You don’t notice this too much when it is played out over decades. But with higher awareness the cycle gets much shorter. – Steve
I think you’re totally on the right track with the idea of the test runs. You manifest something you want (“baby” sized to test it out) and then you realize that in the having of it, your wanting changed. So you unmanifest it because it no longer suits your needs (it did, but now it doesn’t). – Leslie
You’re just really in tune with what you want & don’t want…and as what you want changes, your vibration “unmanifests” the old (or actually I think just manifests the new vibration). – Leslie
The word ‘fear’ just came to my mind. Is there something that you are afraid of in having what you’ve manifested? – Marcus M
If the unmanifesting was unwanted, I think it’s a matter of learning to ground the new, expanded energy. Try getting familiar with really being with your new reality. It may be that being in the presence of what you have attracted still raises some issues (worthiness, expectations, pressure, fear of loss…) that make you back off. Get acquainted with your new reality by breathing easily & slowly in the presence of it, and allowing it to really fill & permeate your space. – MV
Sounds like there is some resistance there. You manifest because the desire is strong yet there is some resistance around beliefs, comfort zone etc. As your vibration simultaneously changes while the manifestation is still unfolding, so does the evidence of the physical manifestation.
Vibe change = you lose what you manifested.
Think back to how you felt once you got what it was you wanted…do you notice any change? – LG
WOW!! I couldn’t have summed it up any better than this.
So it ranges from not really wanting it in the first place, to letting saboteurs creep in and stop you from moving to the next level.
So what are some ways you can manifest and KEEP your manifestations?
- Sit with your intentions for a wee bit longer
- Check in with them regularly
- Keep correcting and refining the direction of your dreams if they’ve changed
- Enjoy these manifestations as signs of land (via DB) or indicators that you’re going in the right direction.
- ——————– What else?
Because life isn’t just about what happens when you get to your dream, but more about the little tweaks and changes and new experiences that happen along the way. Just like a plane flying across the world doesn’t fly in a straight line and adjusts to the conditions, minor course corrections are what keep us going along the path to our dreams….
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Huge thanks to those who responded on facebook, for letting me share your insights! I am looking forward to hearing YOUR thoughts on this now. What have you noticed about manifesting, dreams, intentions, fears? Thanks in advance xo
Guest Post: How Pennies Changed My Life
I met DC based blogger, facilitator & coach Leslie Stein on twitter a few months ago, and then in person when she visited Vancouver in the fall. Was blown away by her amazing Penny Project and cajoled her into writing about it for you.
She’d love to hear from you so be sure to leave her a comment. Prepare to be REALLY inspired! Happy reading!
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I’ve learned an incredible amount in the last 3 years.
There have been lots of reasons for this. Classes I’ve attended, people I’ve met, the place I’ve traveled, the challenging work I pushed myself to take on.
But of all the places & all the things, I have to admit that the largest part of my learning came from a place I never expected.
Most of what I’ve learned in the last three years, I learned from pennies.
Yep, pennies.
The little 1-cent jobbers most people ignore without a second look. You’re probably wondering, “What could you have possibly learned from a penny?!”
Believe it or not, I’ve picked up some pretty huge life lessons.
I guess it all started on December 29th, 2006 when I randomly found a $20 bill in the crosswalk on my way home from work. I’m not usually one for New Year’s resolutions, but this $20 bill got me thinking (after I finished my happy dance & spent it on getting a pedicure).
I mean really…were people just tossing $20’s in the street?
(I think I may have pinpointed the source of our economic woes!)
Long story short, I decided to start picking up all the change I found in 2007 to see how much I’d end up with. So I started picking up pennies…or really any money I found on the ground, but mostly pennies.
I was pretty shocked at how much I was finding.
- By June I had about $15 and a handful of friends also bringing me their pennies.
- By September I’d started a blog about my found money adventures and been filmed to be in a short movie about pennies
- By the end of the year, my little band of change collectors & I had amassed over $85 in total.
Not bad.
All the while this Penny Project was going on I was having a series of meltdowns about why my life wasn’t turning out to be a ‘10.’ I wanted to be happy like everyone else.
Why couldn’t I find someone to date in DC? Why had I been a bridesmaid 7 times and never a bride? Why…why, why, WHY?!
I was having these meltdowns via telephone with my mom, who also happens to be one of my closest friends. Every time I called, I kept asking her why my life wasn’t a 10.
Finally one day, she said, “Are you so sure it’s not?”
Um yeah…I think I’d know if my life was a 10.
Her theory was that I had a lot of good days. Let’s call these days ‘7s.’
And every once in awhile, I had a REALLY good day, which we’ll call ’10s’. Mom could list off several of these days without trying too hard.. like the day a friend of mine took me to The Grammy’s. It was hard not to call that a 10 even when I was pouting on the phone with mom!
She said that for my life to be a 10, maybe all I needed was a series of 7s and a 10 every now and then.
Huh!? I’m a language major and not always the best with numbers… but I still didn’t know what kind of “new math” gave my mom the idea that 7+7+7=10.
I wasn’t buying what she was selling.
Then one day on my way home I found a $5 bill. I was so excited I could barely contain myself (I’m pretty sure I screamed and completely freaked out the lady walking behind me).
(I know $5 isn’t much…but pick up grimy pennies out of the gutter for a few months and you’ll have a whole new appreciation for a fiver!)
Anyhow, I got home and added it to my spreadsheet and saw that I had broken the $20-mark for the year. I had been secretly challenging myself to see if that would happen…with months left in the year I had already bested my $20 find.
It was a nice moment.
Over the next few days on my walks to work (2+ miles each way…lots of time to think and scan the sidewalk for pennies) I compared my life to the Penny Project.
I started thinking about my mom’s comments and equated my findings to the scale we’d been talking about.
- Finding paper money of any kind…that is definitely a 10, or what I would call a “peak experience.” Major excitement,possibly some screaming.
- Finding a quarter…gotta give that a 9. That’s 25 pennies. All at once. Definitely a week-maker.
- Nickels & Dimes, those are 8s. Seeing silver definitely makes me smile. It’s not a huge deal…but damn it’s exciting to see a shiny thing on the sidewalk and realize it’s more than 1 cent!
- Finally, our friend the penny, comes in at a 7. You can’t buy anything with it. Most people get so annoyed with them they just leave them on the sidewalk if they drop one.
But since starting my project, I’d grown to appreciate the little buggers and definitely got a warm fuzzy when I saw one.
It wasn’t enough to make me think finding one made a red letter day (I found one almost every day on the way to work…usually several) but each one definitely made me smile and think of the spreadsheet and my friends who were also looking for pennies (by now it was up to 30 or 40 people).
As the year came to a close I tallied up all my pennies & other money. In 2007, I found a total of $32.76. And with all the money my friends found & contributed, the total was up to $85.56. Not bad for abandoned coins and the occasional paper currency.
As I looked at the totals, I thought back to my mom’s “new math” and heard her saying, “Maybe 7+7+7=10.” Was it possible she was right?!
After a year of picking up these grubby, little coins, I could see that the majority of what I’d found had been pennies.
Sure there was a few quarters and dimes (and that very exciting $5 bill) in the total…but mostly I’d accumulated a whole bunch of ‘7s’
And when it was all said and done, they added up to MORE than my original $20…which I thought of as a ‘10′.
Crap! I love my mom…but I really hate having to call and tell her she was right.
So here’s what I’ve concluded from this rather ridiculous experience – Happiness is here…you just have to see it.
Figure out what the 7’s are in your life.
Most people don’t need help w/ the 10’s…marriage, birth of a child, graduation, promotion… the good stuff we celebrate with parties. But few of us ever consider the 7s.
When I started to really pay attention to them, I found there were a lot more than I had realized. Silly things.
Like the fact I totally love getting the mail. Don’t know why, I just always have. Even if it’s junk mail or the mailbox is empty. There’s that moment of anticipation before I open the mailbox that maybe, just maybe…today’s the day I get something really, really good!
I also rate as 7’s:
- a good cup of coffee
- sleeping in
- wearing my pink galoshes in the rain
- my cat purring
I could go on and on…but the point isn’t to list all my 7s…it’s to inspire other people to think about theirs.
What are your life’s pennies? Do you take stock of them and put them in your emotional piggy bank or just overlook them as unimportant because really…what’s a penny gonna get you?
As silly as finding happiness in pennies sounds…it really has made a huge impact on my life. And in fact, it’s made an impact on some other lives as well.
Since starting this project, hundreds of people have donated found money, opened their wallets, written me checks, or just emptied their pockets and handed over the contents.
When we hit the $500 mark earlier this year, we donated the money to the first annual Young Women’s National Conference, promoting self-esteem for young girls 14-17 years old (http://www.ywnc.net).
All those pennies paid for the financial literacy panel at the event!
Of course, I still don’t have life completely figured out. There are still tearful calls to my mom wondering why I’ve now been a bridesmaid 9 times and am on deck for number 10.
But the tears don’t last as long because I can look around at my warm cup of coffee, the keys to my mailbox, my purring cat, and all my pennies to see that even without having EVERYTHING I want, my life really IS a 10 after all!
(For more information on The Penny Project or Leslie’s other initiatives, you can visit her website at www.fullcircleinspiration.com. Go ahead and leave a comment telling us what you thought of Leslie’s post and PLEASE do share your own 7’s in life - we’d be delighted to hear from you!)
Interview: On Real Life LOA, NLP, Alignment, Attracting Money, Conflicting Intentions
Filed under: Conscious Creation, Law of Attraction, Spirituality
Woohooo! I was interviewed on Seeking Mind, a leading Law of Attraction blog last week. Here’s the interview, unedited and in full. Let me know if you have any questions about the questions (lol) or the answers.
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Meeting Tia (even online) is like bumping into a bundle of positive energy. I got to know her through Twitter, a couple of months back, and I am glad that our paths crossed. What I love most about her is her willingness and resolve to extend her own boundaries.
If she is your friend on Twitter or Facebook you’ll know what I mean. She is always on the go and coming up with one way or the other to inspire us. I interviewed Tia about the Law of Attraction and here is that interview for your reading pleasure. Enjoy and Learn!
INTERVIEW ON THE LAW OF ATTRACTION
Sunny: What is the relationship between NLP and LOA? Do they compliment each other and if so which specific NLP techniques we can apply to LOA to make it more effective?
Tia: I’ll break it down for you. NLP = Neuro (mind) Linguistic (language) Programming (behavior).
It’s described as an attitude, a methodology and a communication tool that helps us change limiting beliefs, create empowering ones and model successful behavior, using techniques like reframing, muscle testing, eye accessing, sensory perception etc.
“At another level, NLP is about self-discovery, exploring identity and mission. It also provides a framework for understanding and relating to the ’spiritual’ part of human experience that reaches beyond us as individuals to our family, community and global systems. NLP is not only about competence and excellence, it is about wisdom and vision” That’s the Wikipedia version.
Language is VERY important in NLP and this is where LOA could be its sister. LOA says, what we focus on, we attract and it teaches us to use affirmations – act and speak as if what we wanted has already happened. NLP teaches us ways to communicate more effectively by changing the language we use, reframing how we say things and changing years of self limiting beliefs to replace them with self serving beliefs.
Can you see the similarities? Of course there are differences too but what you focus on expands so I’m sticking with what I want to believe 
The NLP technique that works best for me in my LOA practice is reframing – the art of changing a context or situation.
Example: If I wanted to change a belief that says “I’m no good at public speaking”, I would imagine myself in a situation where I feel confident and relaxed and people tell me how good I am at public speaking.. I would see myself walk onto a stage and feel comfortable, I’d pick the microphone up and feel it in my hands, like an extension of me.. I would imagine this room full of supportive, excited people eager to learn from me… etc. I would feel how I want to feel in that situation.
And I’d say to myself “Wow, I must be good at public speaking if so many people want to hear me”. As I got comfortable with that I would progress to “I’m a great public speaker, I have so much fun and am a natural at it”. Thus integrating my two favorite approaches.
Getting into the feeling place is very important – whether it’s by visualizing or affirming, or acting as if. Use whatever works best for YOU.
Sunny: Why do most people fail to attract enough money in their lives? How can one effectively change one’s limiting beliefs about money which have been drilled into him for years by his environment?
Tia: Gosh Sunny, the golden question! I’d say a HUGE part of being able to attract money or anything else we want in our lives has to do with our beliefs. Think about the messages you got from your parents, their friends, teachers and society in general.
Stuff like “money is hard to come by without struggle, only the rich get richer, if you want to be rich you have to study and work hard” or if you were lucky, messages like “money is just energy, the more you do what you love the more you’ll attract to you”.
Unfortunately, experience shows that it’s the former message style most of us grew up hearing. Because that’s what our early childhood influencers learned as well. It’s no one’s fault, but so important to be aware of what our money messages are before we can start to change them.
It all starts by starting. What I mean by that is, take the first step.
Pick up a book, start reading personal development blogs, hire a coach, become aware of your actions, words and thought, question your beliefs and ask “who told me this”?
The most important thing to know is that to change, one must WANT to change. So I’d ask, do you really want to change these beliefs? Often people think “of course I want to change, I want more money, what a stupid question that is, Tia”
Not really. Here’s the deal – most of our beliefs are subconscious. So, on a conscious level if you think you’re ready to change your money beliefs and attract abundance and it’s not happening yet, could be there’s an unknown barrier to it. You’ve now got two opposing beliefs that cancel each other out!
Let me explain. A great way to find clues to resistance is by writing down everything you think would happen if you became rich (or whatever else your dream is).
Example:
- I’d have enough money to do what I want
- Life would be so easy
- I’d quit my job and travel the world
All sounding great, right?
Well the flip side could well be thoughts like:
- Friends and family would be jealous
- I won’t know if people want to know me just because I have money or because I’m a great guy/girl
- I might become lazy (clashes with your value of being productive etc)
Another common reason is something called the “set point”. I can’t remember where I first heard about this but it’s the reason why most people who win the lottery end up losing it all within years.
What happens is that we all have a set point – an amount of money that we are comfortable with. So for someone who thinks $10,000 is a lot of money, every time they get set to earn more, they end up sabotaging themselves subconsciously to ensure they don’t have more than they are comfortable with. Sounds crazy but it’s a fact.
Comfort zones are highly dangerous for this reason – they’re the anathema to growth.
It’s so important to change your mindset as well as your belief system to attract anything you want in life. Other techniques you can use are Psych-K (muscle testing to change beliefs), NLP, affirmations etc.
Sunny: How do you align your words, thoughts and deeds so that you are congruent in your life? Which has the highest vibrational imprint among them, words, thoughts or deeds?
Tia: You ask some great questions my friend. Mike Dooley of TUT says, “Thoughts Become Things – Choose The Good Ones!” At least, I think it was him who said that.
Your energetic body-mind has the highest impact. Words, thoughts and actions all have an impact on the vibe you have but I’d say we’re habituated to doing what we do as a result of what we think.
I wish I could tell you a magic formula! Ok maybe there is a small magic formula that is SO simple we forget about it – do what feels good! At any given time, make feeling good your priority.
Follow your intuition and take Inspired Action.
This is the best and fastest way I’ve found to get into alignment with my desires.
Do.What.Feels.Good. That’s it.
(If you have questions like “but I can’t ignore reality and if the reality is that things aren’t going the way I want, how can I feel good?” then this post is for you to learn how to change your reality. And on the flip side, be careful not to use feeling good as cop-out)
Sunny: What role has the Law of Attraction played in your own life and how do you apply it on daily basis?
Tia: I love the Law of Attraction! Truth be told, I don’t like to limit it to being called LOA because it sounds a bit woo-woo to people. I prefer to call it conscious creation techniques. What’s in a name though hey, it changed my life and that’s a fact.
How did it change my life? I stopped blaming people for making my life hard. I took control of my own life and happiness. I started focusing on what I wanted rather than what I didn’t want. I stopped taking anything personally.
I realized that just because I failed at something didn’t make me a failure. I developed confidence and self esteem. I practice living in the present moment (very challenging thing to do!).
By embracing life and counting my blessings, I started attracting MORE of them in my life.
I practice LOA daily by being aware of what I’m thinking and choosing to create as part of my reality. Every time I have a thought like “why hasn’t what I wanted happened yet?” or notice my vibration dipping or being upset, I use my 7 tips to manage your vibe or use Abraham-Hicks Vibrational Scale to move to a better feeling place.
Sunny: How do we resolve the issue of conflicting intentions?
Tia: Conflicting intentions could be telling us that we don’t really want the thing we say we do want, or they could be an indicator of self limiting beliefs or they could be our fear about actually GETTING what we ask for – any number of reasons! Some ways to find out what’s going on are:
- Awareness – Get clear on what you want. Not what you say you want, but what you really, truly want. Until that happens, every intention you send out will be cancelled by a conflicting one. So might as well find out what it is right away.
- Take a piece of paper and write down everything that would change in your life were this intention to come to life.
- Make sure you’ve written the flip side down too (as talked about in the second question above). Often these will be fears or self limiting beliefs that sabotage your desires
- Feel the fear / resistance to anything that came up in the previous question, accept them and listen to the message they want you to hear
- Work through the fear/ resistance – decide if what you want is worth facing these fears and make a commitment to it.
- Remain aware of self sabotage attempts to derail the intentions
- Stop giving it any negative energy. Focus on what feels good!
Sunny: Do you think that events and circumstances as either good or bad? When a seemingly tragic or negative event happens in your life, how do you handle it?
Tia: Everything that happens is a result of our vibrational creation. While I believe there isn’t a good or bad, just actions and consequences and the meaning we give them, there are some things I really struggle with (like child abuse, wars etc).
All I can say is that there is a force larger than us called Human Consciousness. What you or I do has an effect on the entire world by way of a ripple effect. We human beings are a part of everything that happens and we use labels like good or bad because we need a context to live within. Because we believe in duality and separateness rather than acknowledge that they are the sides of the same coin and intermingled with each other.
I’ve been through some rough times and what keeps me going is knowing that no matter what happens I will be able to handle it. I get that it’s hard to imagine we created something “bad”. “WHY would I do something like that” you may ask.
I believe that we came to Earth with a purpose (which we forgot about when we took birth.) If my purpose is to make a difference in this world and make sure no child feels abandoned, then to know what it feels like I must go through abandonment myself. That’s something I could look at and say is bad because it hurt me but if it helped me become more independent and gave me inner strength to be a survivor – would the abandonment still be considered bad?
No, right? It’s a matter of perspective. What doesn’t kill us, makes us stronger.
I handle negative events by really feeling the associated anger or sadness (instead of pushing it away), going through all the emotions that come up with it, allowing myself to feel it all. Then, I start picking myself up again and reminding myself of what’s good in my life, everything has a reason and what can I learn from this situation.
Here is a process I use that I wrote about:
- Make peace with what is, you don’t have to like it but do acknowledge it
- Feel, feel, feel through your emotions, don’t hold back
- Talk/write about the things you have with appreciation
- Continue to be grateful for all that is in your vibrational escrow and ready to appear in your physical world
- Stay focused on what you want, affirm it daily
- Keep blame and guilt to a minimum, not serving you!
- Drink lots of water to hydrate & flush out toxic energies
- Reach for a better feeling place, one thought at a time
- Practice extreme self love, forgiveness and gentleness towards yourself and others
- Reach out for support – friends, books, meditation, blogs like this etc
- Detach from the outcome and the process of wanting the manifestation to happen in a certain way – you have NO idea how wonderfully it is being orchestrated behind the scenes and by being attached to it happening your way, you’ll just block this universal magique (gosh how I love that word, can you tell!) (Sunny: Yes, I can
)
For the rest of the article, check out when life throws me a curve ball.
Sunny: What other ideas, thoughts or inspirations would you like to share with the readers of Seeking Mind.Com?
Tia: I’ll share some of my favorite quotes and ideas!
- Do or do not, there is no try (from Yoda!)
- Happiness is easier than you think it is.
- Live passionately! A life without passion is a life half lived.
- Don’t wait till you know everything to do anything. Do it now!
If you’re a procrastinator, you’ll find it very useful to listen to this call for tips on overcoming procrastination. As you hear people’s stories, you’ll be surprised to learn that it may not be a bad thing sometimes.
PS: It takes a few seconds for the call to load so be patient, thanks!
Sunny: Tia, I’d like to thank you for sharing your thoughts on the Law of Attraction with us.
CONNECT WITH TIA:
Website: http://www.coachtia.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/lifecoachtia
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/tiasparkles
Giving Your Power Away And Don’t Know It?
The other day I went to the gym. After a month long hiatus.
Now you probably know it’s hard enough getting INTO a new routine, without dropping in and out of it.
Well, let this be official: it’s even harder if you secretly hate part of your routine.
Oh say, like the squats. (SQUATS! What kind of a funny name is that anyway? Huh!)
Skawts. For some reason, they are exceptionally hard for me to do, yet I kept doing them. I “had” to cos they were a part of the training schedule that had been developed by the trainer & me. Week after week, dreading and still doing them.
Did it even occur to me that I could have just scrapped that part of my routine?
Er.. I’m almost red-faced to say NO.
I wished I could, but I’d convinced myself I wouldn’t reach my desired goals.
Mistake # 1! Assuming that once a “seemingly good” decision has been made, it’s always going to be good.
I laboured with the sets and # of reps. Got so sore I could barely walk without wincing for 3 days. I still went back and pushed myself again, repeating this series of events for a month. I was gonna conquer those SKAWTS!
Mistake # 2! Ignoring the messages being sent by my body and relating to the “no pain no gain” theory.
Then I reduced the reps. Which led to guilt for not doing it properly and losing motivation. Which saw me not going for a month, until this “other day” I’m talking about.
Mistake # 3: Giving up without looking into what was happening or finding a way to get creative about my routine.
This time around, as I started doing those darn squats again, a flicker of an idea whispered “gee, you could just skip this part, y’know”. It was like the wool had been lifted off my eyes.
The “truth” that I believed – that leaving this bit out was going to ruin the results – wasn’t so true anymore.
What happened next? I got up and moved on to the next exercise with a big smile on my face. HAH!
Who’s to say I can’t look (and feel) the way I want by doing exactly what I want? In this case not only did I ignore my feelings, but I also clean forgot about exercising my MOST important muscle – the Power of Choice!!
It got me thinking.
Where else in my life do I give this power away? Where do YOU?
Like me, you exercise choice every day. You’re smart enough to know YOU choose everything – from your feelings to your reactions to your experiences to the clothes you buy and breakfast you eat.
And yet, like me, sometimes you too forget that you have that power at all!
- It happens when you let your lack of knowledge or expertise stop you from taking action
- When you try to live your life by other people’s standards
- When you let someone treat you badly cos you can’t change them
- When you let fear make your decisions for you
- You lose your power when you let life happen to you rather than making life happen
Think about it for a moment. Is there a part of your life that “makes” you feel powerless? Have you been through something so bad that you can’t imagine it ever being right again? Are you bogged down by all the things you want to do and conflicted between them and the ones you “need” to do?
Whatever your situation or particular challenge, I invite you to have another look. If you’ve been choosing what’s happening without consciously knowing it, it’s time to choose differently.
When you remember you have a choice in every single moment, a choice to think and act in a way that supports you, opportunities, events and ideas unfold that weren’t obvious to you earlier.
You’ve been given a gift, the gift of choice. How are you using it?
____________________________________________________________
I’d love to hear about the choices you’ve been making, conscious or subconscious, where you’re giving your power up. What are you choosing and what would you rather? Thanks for sharing!
On Gratitude & Facing Fears
Don’t have much to say today except that I did a few things recently that I’m well proud of..
- Taking the time to express real gratitude and appreciation for the blessings in my life
- Facing a couple of huge fears
- Asking a stranger to record me talking on video
- Actually speaking on camera
- Putting it out there for the world to see .. yikes!
I was going to do it way back in Feb 2009 for the Hurricane of Gratitude group started by Alex Karis and it’s no surprise it took me 9 months to get here (many big changes / events seem to happen in my life 9 months after the first sign) the birth of creativity and courage, lol!
When was the last time YOU were truly, really grateful and appreciative of how GREAT you have it? What are you really proud of here and now?
If it’s been a while, stop right now and think about all that’s awesome in your life, gives you pleasure, joy and happiness.
From your body to your spirit, nature, family, warm home, food to eat, winter sports, your favourite cookies, you’ve got a lot more going for you than you may realise.
Especially in the middle of a “tough break”, when you feel like everything’s going wrong and you’re overwhelmed, stop and breathe.. And think about the wonderful experiences you’ve had so far and all that you’ve accomplished.
Dream about the changes you want, the life you want to live. And as you do, be grateful for all that you have right now.
The simple act of gratitude /appreciation will bring more of that to you.
I’ve been on a smiling high ever since I did this video. Even if you don’t want to make your own video, go ahead and use the gratitude muscle today!
I’d love you to share what you’re grateful for and proud of in the comments below. And if you make a video, PLEASE come back and post a link!!
And while we’re on the topic of gratitude, I’m grateful to have had the opportunity to talk about about facing your fears, courage, happiness, discovering your passion, making FUN a part of daily life, taking Inspired Action and much, much more in this interview I did for the Spiritual Explorer show recently.
It was a right BLAST and we laugh and giggle a lot as we share some real life experiences of gutsy people following their dreams.
Would love to know what you think of it! Have a great weekend
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